We’re looking at feedback delivery, self-care, and torturing people (into greatness) this week in our resources.
:: Image of the Week
:: CSN’s Book of the Week Recommendation
Human First, Leader Second: How Self-Compassion Outperforms Self-Criticism
Stuck in the myth of “perfectionism,” leaders often lead with a hard edge for fear of being seen as “weak” if they show any emotion or lean into self-care. However, as Massimo Backus shares in his new book, hard-edged leaders often lack compassion towards those they lead because the component of self-compassion is missing. Contrasting traditional leadership styles, Massimo’s blueprint leads us into a more modern approach to separate the person from the title, allowing space for “humans first” with a 6-step framework to grow awareness around the importance of self-care while debunking the myth that compassion equals weakness.
He also covers the three components of self-compassionate leadership: awareness, acceptance, and accountability; with some detailed information on navigating each of these areas.
https://www.amazon.com/Human-First-Leader-Second-Self-Compassion/dp/1523007052/?_hsmi=310907720
“The reality is that the only way change comes is when you lead by example.” – Anne Wojcicki
:: Fostering Kindness and Empathy
Kindness Starts with Self-Care – Well Wisconsin Webinar Recording
Well Wisconsin hosts webinars about self-care regularly, and most recently the topic was about kindness. Check out this pre-recorded webinar, and peruse their other recordings at https://www.gotostage.com/channel/wellwisconsinwebinars.
:: Self-Leadership Development
Explore Resources From Past BLUEPRINT Summit Speakers
The folks at Conant Leadership have had many great BLUEPRINT Summits over the past few years. CSN has share these events sometimes, and the good news is that all of the recordings have been archived on a main central site for reference. There are some heavy hitters like Stephen M.R. Covey, Brené Brown, Dan Pink, Liz Wiseman, and Susan Cain to name a few. You can access all of these informative conversations at https://conantleadership.com/video/ after registering for free on their website.
https://conantleadership.com/video/
The Habits That Hold Leaders Back, with Marshall Goldsmith
Marshall Goldsmith is one of the world’s leading executive coaches. He’s written 56 books, selling over 3 million copies, including 8 bestsellers and 4 New York Times bestsellers. He’s been ranked twice by Thinkers50 as the #1 leadership thinker in the world and ranked the #1 executive coach in the world for over a decade.
Marshall’s most popular book is What Got You Here Won’t Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Successful*. On this week’s episode of Coaching for Leaders, Marshall explored the key lessons from this iconic book and the most common habits that hold leaders back.
https://coachingforleaders.com/podcast/habits-that-hold-leaders-back-marshall-goldsmith/
:: Work Culture & Team Development
Torture People Into Greatness
This is NVIDIA CEO Jensen Huang who talks about himself as a coach. That is his job. To grow people. Isn’t that all leaders’ or managers’ first duty: to grow their people? And to let them know that they see the potential and will do everything possible to put them where their potential can serve the organization the best.
It may not be in their current role. But that doesn’t mean they are a drag on the organization. That just mean that they should be doing something more suited to their talents and disposition. Some organizations squeeze all the lemon juice out and discard the rest – and some grow fruit orchards. Where would you rather work?
If you are not willing to risk the unusual, you will have to settle for the ordinary. – Jim Rohn
What You Pay Attention To, You Get More Of – So Why Are You Focusing So Much On Your Mistakes?
What you pay attention to, you get more of. Focusing our energy on our weaknesses might scratch that evolutionary itch in our hindbrains, but the research backs up that this is ultimately a distraction from our distinctive strengths.
:: Communication
Don’t soften your feedback
In Radical Candor, Kim Scott explored why it may be harder for men to be radically candid with women. She wrote, “Most men are trained from birth to be ‘gentler’ with women than with men. Sometimes this can be very bad for the women who work for them.”
In other words, men might hold back from providing constructive feedback to women employees.
But that’s not all. As Lean In and McKinsey found, giving feedback to someone different from us can also be uncomfortable. Here’s why. We might be concerned they’ll think we hold prejudices against them because of their race, sexual orientation, religious beliefs, or educational background. To avoid this perception, we might soften the feedback.
Yet, constructive feedback helps people to grow in their careers. Folks, let’s not ease up to avoid hurt feelings or because we don’t want to come across as prejudiced.
https://womenintheworkplace.com/2016
“Communication is about what is received, not what is intended. If there is a gap between what you are saying and what they are hearing, you have to find a new way to say it.” – James Clear
:: Training
The AGES Model Provides a Better Way to Learn
Are you conducting training sessions, especially online? Learn about the AGES model from the NeuroLeadership Institute, which sets conditions for optimal learning. Make the most of your time with others by following these guidelines.
https://neuroleadership.com/your-brain-at-work/learn-ages-model
:: Diversity and Inclusion
Diversify your network
Having a diverse network is a foundation for being a better ally. Yet, many of us have primarily homogenous professional networks.
When I was doing research for my book Better Allies, I learned from a report by the Kapor Center for Social Impact that 75% of white people don’t have any people of color in their social network. And, from a Women in the Workplace study by Lean In and McKinsey & Company, women are more than five times more likely to rely on a mostly female network.
Let’s face it. Talking among ourselves creates an echo chamber effect and limits our access to other perspectives, experiences, and resources. Networking with people who share our same gender identities, ethnicities, educational backgrounds, and income brackets, for example, allows us to learn from each other, vent, and swap stories. Still, it doesn’t help us understand how people with different and more marginalized identities than us experience the workplace.
Here’s a small but significant step to diversify and expand your network: At professional events or in the cafeteria at work, introduce yourself to someone who seems different from you. (While not all differences are visible, many are.)
If you’re uncomfortable doing so, consider starting the conversation with a friendly “Hello. I don’t think we’ve met before. My name is X.” Then, ask, “What’s on your mind today?” It’s a great question to kick-start any conversation. (This suggestion comes from The Coaching Habit by Michael Bungay Stanier.)
Taken from the Better Allies newsletter at https://mailchi.mp/4236697e6bd4/5-ally-actions-sep-06-2024?e=6ad6c46384
“Adventure is worthwhile.” – Aesop